It’s about to get reeeeeeal sketchy up in here, ladies and gentlemen. You know that annoying saying about how you always find something in the very last place that you look? As patronizing as it sounds, I think that applies to more than just the physical things. I’m not trying to get all Matthew Mcconaughey […]
“Simba you deliberately disobeyed me. And also failed to comment on my new dopeass tattoos, do you like them” “Y-yeah dad, they’re pretty sick.” “Thank you son. Now stay the fuck out of the elephant graveyard and also my medicine cabinet.”
“Mr. Owl, how many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?” The real question is what kind of drugs you need to be on to ask an owl about tootsie pops.
They say that even the Buddha would get pissed off if you poked him three times. I just wonder, what in the hell would possess someone to poke Buddha three times? How bored do you have to be to do that?
If it were possible to create a perfect piece of photo-realistic art just by following a specific recipe, you could bet your firstborn I would monetize that shit. I would guard it more savagely than the Colonel protected his original thirteen herbs and spices. I would start a cold war with entire nations by threatening […]
I used to think that progress in fitness was a matter of “Wow, we’ve come a long way.” Now it’s more like, “Damn, we’ve got a lot more work to do here.” Fun psychological fact: everything has an expiration date, mentally and physically. If not, memories would never disappear. You would always remember that perfect […]
I really, really want to learn how to fuse 3D depth with 2D acid trips. I’m still studying the basic drawing fundamentals, but the temptation to break rules is really strong. It almost seems like trying to give a chunk of granite the properties of water, but I know the methods are out there and […]
Before I opened up a shop for graphic clothing and accessories, I was considering the cost-benefit ratio of a master plan to starting prohibition all over again just to sell bootleg whiskey. I can understand why people often think twice about taking the plunge into taking art seriously. After all, for a lot of people, “starving” and “artist” […]
There’s a certain point in the night at which time becomes something like maple syrup that’s caught midway between the base of the bottle and the lip of the dispenser; no ability to discern exactly how long its been moving along so far, just a sweet mix of indulgence and slow-burning energy. We arrive a […]